Preschool, High School, College...Oh My!

Ten years ago, this summer,  I was preparing to send my oldest child off to college.  I remember waking up one morning and realizing that in less than three months she would be on her own and no longer under my roof.  I began to bombard myself with many questions and doubts. Did I teach her everything she needed to know?  What if she never calls?  What if she doesn't know the difference between cotton and delicates?    I began to worry that  I was not done parenting her and worried that she wasn't ready to leave home.  The only person that wasn't ready...was me.   Six years later I found myself in the same situation as we prepared to send another daughter to college.  Same questions and fears flooded my mind. 

Two more years have gone by and I find myself searching again for dorm bedding, storage bins and desk lamps as child #3 prepares for college.  It is always a bittersweet time watching each one prepare to spread their wings and leave home.  As I prepare for the next few months, God continues to remind me that He loves each one of my children more than I can imagine and He is in control.  I am also reminded of some great advice that has been given to me over the years that may serve other moms preparing to send their graduate off to college.

1)  Set communication boundaries with your child.  As much as we yearn to hear their sweet voice each day, it may be an unrealistic expectation.  Talk about an appropriate amount of time to speak by phone and set up a scheduled time. Use technology.  A quick text is a quick and less intrusive way to say "I love you".  It will also be on their phone and available to see when times are hard.

2)  Even though our hearts will break the day you drop them off at college try to keep your emotions intact.  ( My tears flowed on the ride home) It is good that our children see how much we miss them but can also be hard for them to see a sad mom.

3)  Realize that as moms we have done our job.  We aren't just raising children, but we are raising future adults.  This is why God has entrusted them to us.  To love them...to teach them...to send them out.

4)  Don't assume that your college experience will be their experience. 

5)  Throw away....burn...tear up the GUILT card.   When your child calls home, don't make them feel guilty that they left home.  BE POSITIVE.

6)  Trust them

7)  This is your time to LEAN.  Lean on God, lean on your spouse and lean on someone that has walked this journey before.  I have a dear woman in my life that had sent several children to college before me.  She was and still is a constant support and mentor to me as I navigate new waters.

8)  Don't smother the remaining siblings. It's not their fault that they are still at home.

9)   Let go and Let God! Give it to Him!

Lastly, take it from a mom that has done this three times and will do it again in two years...they will call home.